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Countdown to midnight—How to pace yourself so you make it to the end
My Fellow Inebriates, With one day remaining of this, the penultimate year of the Mayan calendar, some decent bubbly is in order. There’s a multitude of reasons to kiss this year off with some drama....
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ASTROLIQUOR for July 12-18—What the stars say you should drink!
My Fellow Inebriates, Here’s your booze horoscope: Expect bad news concerning a friend’s health, Aries. This person used to be active but is flat on his/her ass right now. It’s serious, so you should...
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ASTROLIQUOR for August 17-23—What the stars say you should drink!
My Fellow Inebriates, Here’s your booze horoscope: As an Aries you sometimes have difficulty maintaining civilized relationships, and this week it gets worse. Your psyche splits in half, freaking out...
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MARQUIS DE LA TOUR—Sacrificed to a turkey
My Fellow Inebriates, When we changed headquarters this summer, we lost the camera charger. Dozens upon dozens of boxes have been searched, and it has not turned up. But if we buy another one, it will...
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ASTROLIQUOR for October 26 to November 1—What the stars say you should drink!
My Fellow Inebriates, Here’s your booze horoscope: Aries, you’re back to your pissed-off self, and some poor sap is irritating you. He/she isn’t even doing anything! It’s all you, Aries, so get your...
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ASTROLIQUOR for December 28 to January 3—What the stars say you should drink!
My Fellow Inebriates, Here’s your booze horoscope: Aries, your finances are good and fucked. You spent a ton of money this holiday season, and you haven’t slowed down. If you don’t get yourself under...
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FREIXENET CARTA NEVADA BRUT—Questionable choice to ring in the New Year
I love New Year and the sparkling wine that comes with it, but OMG, my fellow inebriates, I can’t get my nose into those narrow little flutes. Thankfully, Miss P had a solution. She used an empty...
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ASTROLIQUOR for January 18-24
My Fellow Inebriates, The stars are still being dickheaded, which means you all get an abbreviated reading again, just like last week, only this week we don’t even have a proper theme, people. Yes,...
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ASTROLIQUOR for March 22 to 28, already in progress—What the stars say you...
My Fellow Inebriates, Your booze horoscope is still a mess. I have to admit, dry weekdays are totally getting me down. I can’t even get up in the mornings, never mind figure out what the stars have to...
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ASTROLIQUOR for June 14-20, already in progress—What the stars say you should...
My Fellow Inebriates, I became very stressed out when I realized the booze horoscope is late. But then somebody told me that all the astrological signs are off by a month because they were calculated...
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